Sex is one of the most psychological and complicated of human behaviors. Some individuals can be aroused by some of the most obscure--and sometimes disturbing--stimuli. Psychologists use the word "paraphilia" to describe these atypical or deviant sexual fantasies and behaviors. This blog will explore the psychology behind and the cultural prevalence of paraphilias and the people who live with them everyday.
S&M Shopping Guide
Contrary to popular opinion, sadomasochism isn’t just about whips and handcuffs. There are many different variations on the two basic principles of S&M: control and submission. No matter whether you’re into bondage or piss play, you’ll want the right gear to ensure that your carnal desires are fully satisfied. With this guide to S&M stores and products, divided by preference, you will be able to identify exactly the play objects you need to infuse the maximum amount of pleasure—or pain—into your sex life.
If you’re just entering the scene, it is best to begin with basic bondage fun. Learning the art of restraint can be rewarding for both dominant and submissive partners. It is also an excellent starting point for those seeking to move on to kinkier exploration. The first step to introducing bondage to your bedroom routine is purchasing rope, tape or another type of restraint. Toys in Babeland, the popular sex shop chain that has two locations in Manhattan and one in Brooklyn, carries a vast selection of different restraints, including a black satin bondage kit with hand-ties and a mask ($28), bondage tape ($18) and, for those who are a bit more adventurous, the best-selling under the bed restraints that bind the entire body to the mattress ($58).
Toys in Babeland Manhattan Locations: 94 Rivingston St. (212-375-1701), 43 Mercer St. (212-966-2120)
Toys in Babeland Brooklyn Location: 462 Bergen St. (718-638-3820)
For those who like to incorporate luxury into their carnal escapades, Kiki de Montparnasse, the erotic Soho boutique, is a wet dream come true. The soignée sex shop sells a wide variety of opulent objects, from black silk bondage rope to braided leather lambskin whips. If you’re willing to squander grandiose amounts of cash on your sex life, then by all means go for the $2,400 harvested pearl restraints or the $995 restraining arts kit, which includes lambskin wrist and ankle cuffs, adjustable straps finished with leather trim, a handcrafted leather paddle and straps that can be attached to stationary objects like tables and doors. But if you want to inject a bit of elegance into your bedroom behaviors without breaking the bank, there is no need to quiver. Consider my personal favorite, the 24-karat gold-plated handcuffs that come with a long key on a chain that can double as a necklace ($350) or the braided leather whip ($150).
Kiki de Montparnasse, 79 Greene St.
Phone Number: (212) 965-815
Gay Leather Daddy:
Members of New York’s gay leather cult rely on one store to cater to their every need: The Leather Man. With a selection of both clothing and toys, this gay sex depot offers a dreamy surplus of naughty bits to have a gay sadomasochist shaking with excitement in his boots. Highlights include the black neoprene chaps ($195), the chrome plated steel chastity cock cage ($159.95) and the rubber mouth gag with a long hollow opening for fluids to pass through ($54.95).
The Leather Man, 111 Christoper St.
Phone Number: (212) 243-5339
For those looking to tap into their inner wild beast—either as dominant master or submissive human-as-animal—The Pleasure Chest, a sex toy emporium with locations in New York, Chicago and Los Angeles, is the place to go. Animalistic paraphernalia for those looking to tap into their inner wild beast run from creative gags like the leather and silver metal pony mouth bit ($59.95) and the leather muzzle ($59.95) to more extreme items like the rubber Rottweiler hood ($430.95).
The Pleasure Chest, 156 Seventh Avenue South
Phone Number: (212) 242-2158
A lot of hard work and dedication goes into being a good sissy submissive. In addition to pleasing your dominant top master’s every demand, you must have the proper assemblage of the most revealing submissive outfits and accoutrements. For clothing, there is no place better than Demask, the fetish gear mecca that has outposts in Amsterdam, Dortmund, Munich and New York. Ideal fashion choices for the eager masochist include the skin-tight black patent rubber crotchless Pussy Pant briefs ($70) and the painted on black patent rubber catsuit with a back to front zipper at the crotch for easy access ($423) are the ideal fashion choices for the most eager masochist. To top off your look, it is mandatory to wear a slave collar, and Demask offers a classic leather version with an O-ring ornament ($51.00).
Demask, 144 Orchard St.
Phone Number: (212) 466-0814